1. If GOD had wanted man to fly, he would have given him unlimited frequent flier mileage.
2. If it looks like a duck, talks like a duck and walks like a duck, it's probably some guy
in a chicken suit pretending to be a duck.
3. Man does not live by biscuits alone. He needs a little gravy to go along with it.
4. Always go with your heart. If you go with your gut, it might be gas.
5. If you want to take good pictures, make sure you've got film in the camera.
6. To err is human; to blame it on somebody else is even more human.
7. He who sits on a tack, shall rise again.
8. The problem isn't the school, it's the principal of the thing.
9. GOD did not create anything in this life that was without purpose; but, politicians come awful
close.
10. If one wishes to find himself, look in a mirror.
11. A cemetery is a nice place to visit; but, you wouldn't want to stay there.
12. As long as you are married, no one can single you out.
13. The only time you want to strike out, is when you're bowling.
14. The problem with being an orchestra leader, is that you're always having to face the music.
15. Guitars have a tendency to fret a lot.
16. Beware of man who promises to put you in the movies, for you will become a theater usher.
17.
Toll booths are nothing more than highway robbery.
